Considering being a surrogates, do careful introspection and research about surrogacy. An amazing gift to a loving couple who cannot have children.
A surrogate mother is a woman who carries a baby in her womb for nine months, although the baby is not biologically her own. The decision to be a surrogate mother is one that requires a lot of soul searching and introspection. It also must entail diligent research and thorough physical and psychological evaluations. You have to make sure that you are going to be able to handle carrying a baby for nine months and then giving that baby up to its biological parents. This is not something that should be entered into hastily, or just for financial motives. Many women have heard that you can get thousands of dollars for being a surrogate, and while that can be true, money should never be the reason for your choice; the reason has to be your desire to help a loving couple achieve their dream of having a family.
If you are considering becoming a surrogate mother, you owe it to yourself to thoroughly look into what it is all about. First off, get in touch with fertility clinics in your area. Find out if they have any literature to offer you regarding surrogacy. Speak with doctors about the logistics of the procedures involved. Talk to other women who have been surrogates. Go to online chat rooms for surrogate mothers and the couples who have had the aid of surrogates. The goal should be to get as many vantage points on surrogacy as possible before you pursue your consideration any further. There is no reason to go out and get medical and physical evaluations until you are sure that this is actually something that you are interested in doing. First and foremost, you need to take at least a month to pool as many resources as you can in order to make an informed decision that is not based on a fleeting idea that it would be nice to give surrogacy a shot. If you are married, you should actively involve your spouse in your decision. If you have children, especially young children, you should think about how you would explain the surrogacy process to them. Also consider your career. What would you do if you had to take a leave of absence because of complications with your surrogate pregnancy ? How will your profession be affected by a surrogate pregnancy ?
If you have done your research and introspection, and you are still confident that you would like to become a surrogate mother, your next step should be to contact a local fertility clinic for physical and psychological testing. While you may think that you are physically and mentally sound enough for surrogacy, those opinions have to be verified by a professional through a series of tests. Be prepared to answer questions about your medical history, your family’s medical history, past pregnancies, and more. Also, your spouse (if you have one) will probably be asked to submit to some testing as well, usually at least a blood test to ensure that there are no infectious diseases that could harm your potential surrogate pregnancy. If you “pass” all of the tests, and you are accepted by the fertility clinic into their surrogacy program, it is likely that you will then be asked to begin taking prenatal vitamins to get your body ready for the pregnancy.
Once you have done all the introspection, research, and testing that is required in this decision making process, and you have definitively decided to go ahead with the surrogacy, you still have one step left: finding a couple to be a surrogate for. Choosing the right couple to carry a baby for is equally as important as your decision to become a surrogate. Your fertility clinic will give you information about prospective couples, and you should try to get as much background information on the couple’s “story” as possible before you choose. Consider what factors are important to you, such as the geographical proximity between you and the couple. Always meet prospective couples in person before you agree to become a surrogate for them, and if you have any doubts about the compatibility between yourself and the couple, do not pursue the avenue any further. Wait for the right couple for you to come along.
By Marie Hughes
